


Broken Destiny

by sinnerman



Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-07
Updated: 2015-01-07
Packaged: 2018-03-03 00:40:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2831861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinnerman/pseuds/sinnerman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Theron Shan always feared he was destined for something special.  He didn't want to be special.  But now his destiny has crossed the path of Revan himself, and brought Theron into the arms of a Sith Lord with dark blue eyes.  He knew it was going to end badly.  He just didn't expect that he would care so much....</p>
<p>A series of snippets. (unfinished)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Broken Destiny

_If I didn’t know any better, Theron, I’d think you were somewhat infatuated with me._

Theron leaned back in his chair, and watched the data roll past.  Names, dates, places.  Deaths.  Clean, efficient deaths.  A long list of them, all from the hands of one man.  The man with deep blue eyes and a smile that could melt glaciers on Hoth.  The Sith Lord and Dark Council member, who had just decided to save the galaxy even though it meant going toe-to-toe with an immortal legend.

“Can he really do it?”  Theron had made the mistake of asking, so Lana had decided to show him some of his Lordship’s past achievements.

“Are you convinced yet?” asked Lana dryly.  “Or is there some Jedi hero you would like to offer up instead?”

Theron shook his head.  “You know, if you piled up all these bodies, you would be able to fill most of Manaan’s seas.  Assuming the firaxa didn’t eat them all, of course.”

Lana laughed at the joke, as he had hoped she would.  “So you’re content.  Let’s go back to planning then, shall we?”

“Sure - but, Lana - come on, I mean, you know why I asked, right?  He doesn’t look -”  Theron waved at his screen.  “I can’t see it.  I believe it, because what I’ve seen in the last few hours is really convincing, but - he doesn’t look like a Dark Council member.  He just doesn’t.”

Lana shook her head.  “You wouldn’t understand, Theron, but the truth is very few Sith look like the stereotypical Sith caricature that is so common in the Republic.”  She smiled at him.  “Do I look like the bloodshot, pain-wracked Sith you expected?”

Theron laughed.  “No.  No, you certainly do not.  But at least I’m as dumb as the typical Republic citizen, so there is that.”

“Not at all,” said Lana seriously.  “You think fast, you ask questions, and you listen to answers.  You’re not what I expected at all.”

“Really?”  Theron smiled at her.  “Thanks.”

“And Theron,” she added, suddenly serious, “please don’t be upset with him for teasing you.  It’s fairly common in the Empire, especially for Sith Lords.  They’re not given to restraining their desires.  But Lord Thialfi would never do anything to distress you.  So, please, don’t be afraid or offended.  He meant no harm.”

Theron looked away quickly, and hoped she couldn’t see the quick flush on his cheeks.  “It’s okay.  I’m not - offended.”  He quickly tapped his screen, dismissing the roll of deaths.  “Right, so, uh, back to planning.  We need to focus if we’re going to get anywhere.”

“Yes,” said Lana slowly.  “Planning.  Of course.”

 

_...when you’re done, we can start picking out backwaters to lie low in._

Thialfi frowned as the dancers on the floor got even more out of hand.  The Corellian band his father had hired - and apparently slept with every member of - were doing their level best to start a complete orgy on the dance floor by playing the most sensuous and arousing music they could think of.  The band members were all Humans, singing in Basic rather than Huttese, slightly old-fashioned music that resonated with all the Humans and Near Humans at the party.  Liquor and other enjoyment enhancers flowed freely.  Music from the sky palace spilled out into the upper levels of Nar Shadaa, causing even more people to invite themselves to the house.

“Wow!  This spice is amazing,” said an extraordinarily happy woman before spinning in a circle.  Thialfi reached out to catch her before she fell off-balance, and set her back on her feet so she could go back to dancing.  “Where did you get it?”

“We made it,” said Thialfi shortly.  “Please, help yourself.”  He gently pushed her in the direction of the refreshment center and walked away.  “Why do I ever listen to him?” Thialfi watched his father dancing in the center of the main dance floor, one arm wrapped around a pureblooded Sith who was busy talking to a scientist from Ord Mantell and paying no attention to the drunk man hanging all over her.  At some point, they had both lost their shirts - or in the woman’s case, upper robes - and Thialfi rolled his eyes as his father leaned over to give the Sith woman a love bite on the neck.

“You look like you disapprove,” said a vaguely familiar voice.

“He makes it all so cheap,” growled Thialfi without looking to see who he was responding to.  “It isn’t love if you would kill people for someone just because you like killing people.”

“You don't think they’re really in love?”  The voice laughed slightly.

Thialfi stopped at the laugh, and looked around.

“Over here,” said the voice, and held out a hand.  He was hiding in one of the shaded alcoves carefully placed around the dance floor.

“What -” Thialfi ran into the shadows, and sat down on the bench next to Theron.  “What are you doing here?”  He took hold of Theron’s hand before the other man could move away.  “I thought you were in hiding!”

“I am,” grinned Theron.  “I’ve never seen a more efficient private network than the one set up here, by the way.  I’m a guest,” he laughed, “I hitched a ride with some Hutts and a smuggler. I’m waiting my turn to use the computers.  I actually didn’t realize you would be here.”  He smiled at Thialfi, and made no move to reclaim his hand.  “I also didn’t realize how rich you really are.  Well, your family, anyway.  This house is something else.”

“I hate it,” said Thialfi quietly.  “I don’t come here unless I have to.”

“It doesn’t really look like you,” Theron agreed.  “So, which estate do you like?  You don’t mind that I looked you up, do you?” he said suddenly.  “It’s just - that’s what I do.”

“I don’t mind.”  Thialfi leaned back into the alcove, drinking in the sight of Theron’s smile.  He seemed to have totally forgotten that he was still holding hands with the SIS agent.  “If I’m not in Dromund Kaas on business, I go to the estate on Tatooine.”

“The one with all the dewbacks and the orobirds?  Yeah,” he smiled as Thialfi nodded.  “I can see that.  That place looks like you.  But which room is yours?  I can’t imagine you in those stuffy Jedi-style rooms upstairs.”

Thialfi laughed guiltily.  “I don’t have a room.  I sleep outside, under the stars.  Campfires and heaters and blankets, and the noise of nesting orobirds.”

“That sounds… I’m almost jealous.”

“Well now you know where to find me when you unexpectedly show up on Tatooine,” said Thialfi softly.

“That obvious?  I’m out of practice.”  Theron was glad for the shadows that hid his blushing.  He looked around, hoping for another topic of conversation, or perhaps a signal from his contact.  Instead, he saw two Republic officers, carefully stepping over passed out bodies on the floor as they followed an Imperial attaché through the house, comparing faces to a datapad.  “Oh shi- ”  Without asking, he pulled Thialfi closer to him, making sure his face was obscured by the other man’s body.  He completely forgot that he was dressed for entertainment until he felt the heat of Thialfi’s hands through the skintight leather pants, practically burning the touch into his skin as Thialfi pulled him into his arms.

They weren’t kissing.  Theron had hidden his face in Thialfi’s shoulder, and now his hands were clutching at Thialfi’s hair, twisting into the soft grey robes Thialfi wore.  Their bodies were touching, more than touching, grinding against each other, instinctive hunger and unbridled desire tearing away at the thin veneers of civilization.  His body responded eagerly to the touch of Thialfi’s hands, straining for release, seeking more. Theron bit his lip, forcing himself to stay silent in case the visitors were recording.  Thialfi pulled him even closer, and he could feel hardness barely concealed by the robes pressing against him.

Theron closed his eyes, trying to remember his training and self-control.  But Thialfi’s lips were on his neck now, warm and soft on Theron’s bare skin, kisses of tantalizing gentleness in contrast with the iron grip of Thialfi’s hands.  Theron pulled his hands away, braced himself on the bench, used the wall to try and recover some semblance of balance, forced himself to listen to the outside world and remember where he was and what he was supposed to be doing here.

The searchers walked closer, clearly intending to investigate the small alcove.  Theron moved to twist away, but Thialfi’s hands held him in place.  Though he had never thought of himself as weak, the Sith was stronger than Theron by magnitudes he had never imagined.  “Don’t,” whispered Thialfi.  A soft warning, enforced by Thialfi’s arms.

There was the sudden glow and unmistakable hum of a lightsaber, and someone stepped into the path of the searchers.  “My Master is occupied.”  The Kaleesh, Thialfi’s apprentice, stood there, seemingly to provide privacy for his master, and the officers quickly backed away to take their search elsewhere.

Theron had never felt so off-balance before.  The sudden rush of relief, the realization that he had literally put his life in Thialfi’s hands.  Theron closed his eyes, stifled the noises he wanted to make against Thialfi’s chest.  He took a deep, shuddering breath, then tried it again, forcing himself to calm down.

“Are you all right?”  Thialfi sounded both concerned and amused.  His warm hands were still holding Theron close, protective and almost possessive.

“Thank you.  I don’t usually - panic - like that,” whispered Theron.  “Sorry.”  He could hear Revel’s loud voice approaching, singing drunkenly as he walked towards the alcoves..  “That’s my contact,” he said quietly.  “I - I guess I should go.”

“Of course,” Thialfi whispered, and slid his hands away with agonizing slowness.  “You’ll always be safe here, whether I’m here or not.”

Theron forced himself to stand up without showing any sign of weakness.  He brushed his hands over his hair, using the motion to give himself time to recover.  A quick glance at the nearest window showed that he was flushed and more sparkly-eyed than he really wanted to be.  He adjusted his shirt slightly, making himself passable.  He didn’t look at Thialfi, or at the Kaleesh who had retreated to the nearby shadows again.  Theron checked the window again, to make sure there was no danger.  He saw Revel, with Lana on one arm and a beautiful Lethan Twi’lek on the other, and knew they were waiting for him to appear.  He bent down, praying that Thialfi wouldn’t touch him again, because he knew he wouldn’t be able to resist.  “Thank you,” he whispered quietly, and pulled himself away before it was too late.  He had just enough time to notice Thialfi’s hands, gripping the bench so tightly the metal was warping beneath his hands.  Theron walked away quickly, before he - before they both - did something stupid.

“You wanted him, Master.  You should have kept him.”

Theron didn’t wait to hear what Thialfi would reply, if anything.

 

_What’s the matter, Theron?  Is my being around so distracting that you have to shuttle me off to some other island?_

“You were pretty brutal with those slavers,” said Theron quietly.  “What was all that about?”

Thialfi sighed.  “I guess I did get a bit personal, didn’t I?  I didn’t mean to.  Old habit, I suppose.”  He saw that Theron didn’t understand, and laughed slightly, more to himself.  “I wasn’t always a Sith Lord, you know.  We’re all born somewhere.  We all have our choices, only sometimes,” he brushed the long lock of hair away from the front of his face, exposing the disfiguring marks beneath.  “Sometimes, those choices are taken from us.”

Theron managed not to gasp at the sight, and only his eyes widened.  “Slave marks.  You - you were a slave?”  Thialfi nodded, and waited patiently for the next question.  “But you - you’re a Lord now.  A noble.  You could take them off.”

“Can I?” asked Thialfi.  His voice sounded strange.  “Would it really matter?  I would still know.  I’d always know.  And I would still want to kill slavers without mercy whenever I find them.  My appearance changes nothing.  It’s burned into my mind, my memories.  That can’t be changed.”  He laughed again, a tinge of bitterness in the sound.  “At least now I can easily prove my excuse.”

Theron nodded in understanding, and suddenly noticed he had his arms crossed, wrapped tightly around each other, as if he were holding himself back.

“Did I frighten you?”

“What? No, it’s not that,” said Theron hurriedly, and unfolded his arms, forcing himself to relax.  “I mean, it was scary, but - no, it’s just - ”  He laughed bitterly at himself and looked down at the floor.  Hardwood that would have cost a fortune on Coruscant, used here for the commonest buildings.  It was all the little things that made no sense that were wearing away at Theron’s sense of what was right and what was wrong.  “You sounded so hurt just now,” he said quietly.  “Made me want to give you a hug.”  He half-hoped that the Sith hadn’t heard him.  It was an awful crazy thing to say.  Sith didn’t need hugs.  And SIS agents shouldn’t hug Sith Lords.

“But,” said Thialfi in a cold, quiet voice that Theron didn’t understand, “you didn’t.”

Theron looked up again, meeting Thialfi’s eyes.  They weren’t the eyes of a Sith Lord.  They were clear blue eyes, not the sullen red ones expected of a member of the Dark Council.  And right now, Theron could see that Thialfi was still hurt.  You weren’t supposed to see vulnerability in a Sith Lord’s eyes.  It was unnerving.  It was making him forget what he was getting himself into.  Theron reached out, and took one of Thialfi’s hands in his own.  “I didn’t,” he said, taking a deep breath.  “Fine, I admit it.  I’m scared.  Not of you - not really.  More - what are we doing here?  We’re crazy.  This isn’t - what are we doing?” he repeated, desperate for understanding.  Something to make sense, something to hold onto.  But all he could feel was the hand in his, warm and strong and alive, gently curling around his fingers.

“I don’t know for sure,” said Thialfi, trying to hide his eagerness and failing.  “But I’m willing to keep doing it and find out.”

Theron was acutely aware that he was holding hands with - the handsomest man he had ever seen in his life.  A man who looked to be about the same age as Theron himself, if not younger.  A man who just happened to be a Sith.

 

_Safehouse_

“Is Jakarro back yet?” asked Lana, wringing water from her hair as she walked into the small sleeping room of the little house at the end of the alley.

“Nope,” said Theron cheerily.  “Just us.  We could seduce each other, if you’re bored.”

She threw a towel at him and walked over to find her brush.  “Thank you, but no.”

Theron fell back on the bed, laughing joyously.  “Oh, come on!  It’s been ages since I had to seduce someone for work!”

Lana stopped, and turned to look at him.  “What happened to him?”

Theron raised an eyebrow.  “Well, I figured it would come up sooner or later,” he sighed.  He threw himself back on his bed, careless of where his muddy boots were staining the coverlet.  “I guess you looked up the old stuff and that Sith Lord, because you’re not a complete idiot and of course you would check out your contacts.”  Theron pressed his hands against his eyes.  “I fucked up, you know that, right?  I wasn’t supposed to kill him.  I also wasn’t supposed to sleep with him.  Stupid, rookie mistake.  It’s listed as a success because I walked away and I got all the data.  It wasn’t,” he said bitterly.  “Everything about that little episode was a complete failure.”

Lana sat down on the plain metal chair across from him, gingerly balancing on the seat.  “Go on.”

Theron threw his arms out, taking up more space but making himself completely vulnerable.  The subtlety of the pose did not escape Lana.  “It all went wrong,” he said quietly, staring at the ceiling.  “Got caught up in the act instead of my job, I wanted to stop, he didn’t.  He was a Sith, and I didn’t get to choose anymore.  So I fought back when I could, and it - I got him killed,” he said suddenly, glossing over details that he didn’t want to remember.  “Do you believe me?”

Lana nodded.

Theron looked at her.  “Sorry.”

“It’s all right,” she said quietly, not quite certain what he was apologizing for.

“So, do I get to ask you a personal question now?”

“Do you have one?” asked Lana curiously.  “I’m not nearly as interesting as you, or Lord Thialfi.”

Theron propped himself up on his elbows and looked at her.  “It’s personal, like I said.  Uh - where to start…. Thialfi’s other apprentice is off having his kid, because it’s apparently required for all Force sensitives to bear children in the Empire, right?  So, where’s yours?”

Now it was Lana’s turn to look away, and down, anywhere but Theron’s eyes.  “You’re right.  That is personal.”  She sighed.  “It’s complicated.”

“Of course.”

She took a deep breath, and tried to figure out where to start.  Theron had twisted himself around again, and now he was lying on his stomach, resting his head on his hands as he watched her.  “My master adored his wife,” she said quietly, “she was a pureblood, just as he was.  A very beautiful woman.  But she couldn’t have children.”  She looked up at Theron.  “You see where this is going, don’t you?  I fulfilled my duty, and my master had a perfect Sith child for his wife to raise.  Powerful in the Force, and a credit to his lineage.”

Theron held out his hand to her.  Lana took it, unsure of what he was planning to do, but he just took her hand and held it gently.  Instinctively, her hand tightened around his.

“Don’t pity me,” she whispered.  “It isn’t something to be sad about.  I wasn’t ready to be a mother, and my master did everything with kindness and respect.”

“What happened after Arkous died?”

Lana smiled wryly.  “Since I was accused of his murder, he wasn’t held up as a traitor.  His legacy persists, and now I have even more reason never to speak to his wife and child.”  She shrugged.  “It is for the best.”  She looked at him curiously.  “Did you know that before you asked me?”

Theron shook his head.  “Not exactly.  I sort of guessed it had something to do with Arkous, though.  I’m glad you told me,” he said seriously.  “I like thinking I can trust you.”

“You can trust me, Theron.”  Lana pulled her hand away, and stood up.  “We are friends.”

“But…” Theron prompted.  “Say it.”

“Say what?”

“Whatever it is you’re thinking,” said Theron impatiently.  “Probably something having to do with Thialfi.”

Lana smiled.  “Am I really that obvious?  You must be rubbing off on me.”

“Oh, hah ha.  Out with it.”

“You like him,” she said quietly.  “Is it a thing, for you?  Sith men make you weak at the knees?”

Theron threw her towel back at her.  “That’s so not funny, Lana.”

“But is it accurate?” she challenged.  “Are you going to forget your duty and screw up our plans because Lord Thialfi likes to smile at you?”

“It’s not part of my plan,” said Theron slowly.  “But I will admit that I like him.”

“Like?”  Lana laughed, trying to hide her bitterness.  “He makes your brain short-circuit.”

“Shows what you know,” laughed Theron.  “I don’t even have a brain!  No, I’m serious.  I know what the stakes are, Lana.  Trust me,” he pleaded.  “I will not screw this up.  I promise.”

 

_Pirates_

“Never thought of you as a fag before,” grunted Revel.

Theron punched the pirate in the arm.  “Stop being a bigoted ass, Revel.”

“I’m just saying, it weirds me out watching you melt whenever the Sith looks at you.  Always thought of you as a playboy, now you’ve turned into someone who subscribes to Sith Teen Monthly and puts life-size posters of your dream master on the wall.”

“What.”  Thereon was too stunned by the ridiculousness of Revel’s comment to be truly offended.

“Lana says it’s just the thought of Sith cock that makes you wet.”

“Why in the good gods’ names are you discussing me or Sith cock with Lana?” demanded Theron.

“Oh, that’s an easy one.  She wants you out of the picture, with regards to any dispensing of Sith cock.  She wants it all to herself.  That’s my take, anyway.”  Revel shrugged.  “So now I’m stuck trying to figure out how to screw her over, and it means you getting screwed.  And I’m weirded out.”

“I’m starting to hate the both of you.”

“It is the Sith cock, right?  I mean, my dick doesn’t do squat for you, does it?”

“Does your dick shoot lightning?”

“No.”

“Pass.”  Theron smirked at the look on Revel’s face, and they both broke out laughing.  “Sith Teen Monthly?  Really?  How the fuck do you come up with this shit, Revel?”

Revel couldn’t stop laughing for a minute, then finally answered, “I did that to his wife, actually.  Mocked up a whole holonet site.  You have to go check it out,” he grinned wickedly.  “Very enlightening.”

 

_It isn't over yet._

Theron gingerly lay down on the bed, and considered.  As far as open invitations went, lying down on a Sith’s bed was pretty clear.  He was still trying to wrap his mind around the fact that Thialfi had his own private warship in the first place.  A Fury-class Imperial Interceptor.  No wonder Thialfi was able to land on restricted planets and travel without leaving a trace.  And this wasn’t just any starship, it was a richly furnished ship worthy of a member of the Dark Council.  Theron reached up, arched slightly so he could see the top of the bed.  A luxuriously plush bed, with a deep purple cover and matching pillows.

“Maker’s breath, that is distracting.”

Theron sat up quickly, and looked at the doorway.  Thialfi was there, leaning casually against the door, his eyes taking in the sight of Theron sprawled on his bed, arched slightly with his head thrown back.  “I’m blushing, aren’t I?”  He looked down and laughed at himself.  “I admit it.  You make me crazy.”  He looked up again, and smiled at Thialfi.  “Which, I hope, explains why I’m in here.”

Thialfi touched the panel on the wall, activating the privacy mode for the room.  “It’s a start, anyway.”  He knew he should talk and explain, but instead he took a step closer and gently touched the cut on Theron’s lip.  “I thought you were going to let the doctor take a look at that.”

Theron smiled ruefully.  “I’m fine, really.  I just need - sleep.  Or something like it.”  He closed his eyes, and let Thialfi’s fingers continue touching his face.  Thialfi’s hands were warm, as usual, and his fingers gently brushed over the ugly cuts and bruises, then traced the outline of Theron’s lips.  Theron leaned into the caress, and suddenly Thialfi’s hands were on the side of Theron’s face, and his lips were on Theron’s lips, kissing him again, fierce and demanding this time.  It stung slightly, the fierce heat of Thialfi’s kisses against his split lip, but Theron wanted those kisses more than he wanted the pain to go away.  He put his hands over Thialfi’s hands, then ran his hands down the other man’s arms as he leaned back into the bed, slowly pulling Thialfi down over him.  “Please,” he whispered, pressing himself against Thialfi to show his desire and his need, “please.”

Thialfi responded with a low noise, almost a growl, of passionate assent.  He kissed him, fiercely, pressing Theron against the soft bed.  But there was no nervousness, no reluctance, no hesitation in Theron’s response.  Theron ground his hips against Thialfi, never breaking the kiss, his hands clutching at Thialfi’s shoulders.  Thialfi moved one hand down, to stroke the eager hardness between Theron’s legs.  He whispered something into Theron’s ear, then kissed him again while he undid the clasp of Theron’s belt.

Theron shivered at the sibilant words.  “I have no idea what you just said, but I think that is damn sexy.”  He moved his hands, and began to undo the laces holding Thialfi’s tunic closed.  “So, are you going to translate?”

Thialfi kissed him on the cheek, while he considered the consequences of his actions.  “Tell me you really want this,” he said softly.  “Just… tell me.”

“Of course I do,” laughed Theron, “but if you want to hear it, okay.  Yeah, I want you.  In me, over me, kissing me, touching me… I want to forget all the reasons I shouldn’t be anywhere near you, and come in your arms.  Probably screaming your name.”  He could feel Thialfi’s reaction throbbing against his body.  Theron smiled, and kissed him again.  “Yes, I want you to fuck me.  And make love to me.  Anything, so long as it is me and you.”

“Peace is a lie,” whispered Thialfi against Theron’s skin as he continued pulling away Theron’s clothes.  “There is only passion, and in my passion, you are the one I desire above all others.”

"I was right," gasped Theron. "That is damned sexy."  He closed his eyes and listened to Thialfi repeat the words again, savoring the foreign cadence of the language of the Sith. It sounded like a prayer, and Thialfi's kisses felt like worship. His jacket had already fallen away, and now Thialfi's hands were inside Theron's pants. Exploring. Touching. Theron moaned, much louder than he really wanted to, as Thialfi gently moved his fingers in a slow circle at the entrance to Theron's body.

"You desire this."

Theron laughed. Slightly nervous, very amused. "Sith sex talk. Why can't you just say fuck, like a normal person?"

Thialfi chuckled, and Theron could feel Thialfi's lips on his skin. First a kiss, then the curve of a smile as he worked a finger inside of Theron, making Theron inhale sharply, then gasp when Thialfi began stroking him with an expert touch.  Theron buried his face in Thialfi’s shoulder, wrapping his arms around Thialfi while his body adjusted to the touch.  Another finger, slowly circling, spreading warmth throughout Theron’s body.

Theron tried to form a sentence, but then Thialfi's fingers moved and pressed against something inside Theron that set off fireworks in his body. He arched back into the touch, his eyes still closed as his hips rocked back and forth, desperate to repeat that sudden rush of sensation. "Yes," was the only word he could get out now.

"I thought you were going to scream my name," Thialfi mused. "How would that ever work? You can barely remember your own."

Theron laughed, a soft, sweet husky laugh, but didn't stop moving against the tantalizing rhythm of Thialfi's fingers. He hadn't even noticed, but at some point Thialfi had poured some rich, slick lubricant on his hand. By now, Theron was wet enough for anything, especially a long, thick Sith cock.

"What did you say?" Thialfi didn't pause in his stroking, only shifted himself slightly so he could kiss a new section of Theron's neck.

"Did I say that out loud?" moaned Theron. "I don't even care, I'll say it again. Oh, that is so good... I want it, Thialfi - oh!" Theron felt his own cock jerking and spurting as Thialfi worked another finger into him, spreading him wide open. Theron blushed at the unexpected reaction, and covered it with humor, as he always did.  “Tease.”

Thialfi laughed, and the sound sent shivers down Theron’s spine.  “Not exactly,” murmured Thialfi.  “Just… practical.”  Three fingers now, slowly working in and out of Theron’s body, a subtle hint of what was to come.  “You’re nervous.”

“Eager,” Theron corrected hoarsely.  He moved, spreading his legs wider for Thialfi, and leaned closer so that he could kiss the Sith on the lips.

“Relax,” Thialfi breathed softly, returning the kisses for passion without ever losing his control.  “I want you to enjoy this, with all of you.  Your mind, your spirit - and yes, I very much want your beautiful body to enjoy this, Theron.  Every moment, every breath, every touch.  Believe in me, Theron.  I won’t leave you wanting.”  His touch was gentle, his fingers strong.

Theron kissed him again.  “Wanton,” he whispered huskily.  “That’s my problem.  Not wanting.  I can’t even begin to tell you how much I want this.”  He kissed Thialfi again, trying to control his desperate need for the man.  “I can only show you.”

Thialfi accepted the kiss, and Theron felt his whole body quiver with barely suppressed passion.  “Please do not mistake my training for coldness,” said Thialfi quietly.  “I do not wish to harm you, Theron, so I must - I cannot lose control.”  He smiled suddenly.  “But, I very much want you to do so.”

“Hey, don’t -” Theron tried to stop him, but Thialfi’s fingers were already there, stroking that same spot again.  Theron shuddered as his body inexorably gave in to the physical stimulation.  “No fair,” he gasped.  Between being filled with Thialfi’s fingers and the stroking, it was all too easy to make him come.

Thialfi just smiled as he carefully withdrew his fingers, and let Theron collapse into his arms. He kissed Theron again. “I will never tire of your kisses,” he murmured, “or those gasps.”  He ran his hands over Theron’s naked body.  “So lovely.”

Theron blushed.  “Can I lie down?”

Thialfi raised an eyebrow.  “Of course.  However you are most comfortable.”

“Thanks.  I just hate being on my hands and knees, that’s all.”  Graceful even in the throes of lust, Theron lay down on the bed, putting one hand behind a pillow, the other resting on his chest.  He looked away for a second, but there were no paintings on the walls here for him to randomly bring up in conversation.  He looked at Thialfi again instead, and smiled.

Thialfi leaned over for another kiss while he ran a hand over Theron’s bare leg, and then settled himself on his knees, spreading Theron’s legs a little wider.  “Whatever pleases you,” he said with a smile.  “I assure you, this pleases me.  Now I get to watch you the whole time.”

Theron blushed again.  “Yay.  Why do you still have your pants on?”  Theron was completely naked, and still had no idea when his clothes had all disappeared.  Thialfi’s chest was bare, showing off the tightly muscled perfection of a Sith assassin.  The slave marks were hidden beneath the stray lock of Thialfi’s hair again.  Ever since Thialfi had mentioned it, Theron found his eyes drifting to the marks in wonder, and tried to figure out how he had never noticed them before.

Thialfi smiled wryly.  “You’re not the only one with ghosts, Theron,” he said mockingly, but Theron couldn’t tell if the joke was meant for him or for Thialfi himself.  “I’m nervous.  It’s not every day a man of the Republic offers himself to me.  I want it, but -”

“Take it,” said Theron quickly, before Thialfi could talk himself out of giving him what he so desperately wanted.  “You know I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t you, right?  I mean, it’s not the title or anything - it’s because you’re a really, really hot guy who I’ve wanted for weeks now.”

The words worked, and Thialfi leaned down to kiss him again, burning kisses to fill the time it took him to remove the last articles of clothing.  “You were a fool to wait so long,” whispered Thialfi, still kissing while he ran his fingers over the soft, wet spot between Theron’s legs.  He laughed as Theron inhaled sharply at his touch.  He worked two fingers into Theron again, spreading more lubricant in the tight, hot channel.

Theron gasped as he felt the heat of Thialfi’s cock against his body.  He reached down to touch it, caressing the thick, massive length, running his fingers along the thick, ridgelike veins that ran the length of the shaft in a distinctly lust-induced haze.

“Theron?”

Theron kissed him eagerly in response, and moved his legs to give Thialfi more room.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” mused Thialfi.  He moved slightly, using one knee to give himself more leverage and began to slowly work the head of his cock into Theron.  Theron gasped, then moaned, noises so sexual that only Thialfi’s training kept him from either coming immediately or ramming his full length into the willing body beneath him.  Instead, he took a deep breath and released it slowly, idly wondering to himself if everyone from the Republic was this chronically sexually repressed.  He moved in a little farther, and Theron’s muscles clamped down on him as Theron starting coming for the third time.  Thialfi watched Theron clutching at him, arching in sudden uncontrollable desire.

“Fuck, you’re stretching - oh, fuck, sorry, I didn't - mean to - ”  Theron took a deep breath and tried to remember how rationality worked.  “Those ridges.  Fuck.  You’re not done yet, are you?”

Thialfi smiled and shook his head.  “Don’t move for a minute, please.”

Theron took another breath, and tried to remember something of his training.  It was hard to concentrate when he knew that his body was ready to explode again as soon as Thialfi got farther inside.  Theron looked down, and sighed softly in appreciation.  He was slightly taller than Thialfi, and broader in the shoulders, but Thialfi was a Sith.  With pure Sith blood somewhere in his ancestry, proved by the magnificent cock currently halfway inside Theron.

“Relax,” Thialfi commanded.  “I am trying very hard not to hurt you. I want you to remember this for the right reasons.”

Theron smiled weakly, and leaned back into the lush pillows again.  He took another deep breath, then closed his eyes to give himself time to rearrange what was left of his thoughts.  He nodded, but Thialfi didn’t move.

“Open your eyes.”

Theron grinned up at him, and opened one eye.  “I’m fine.  You know I’m just going to pass out, right?”

Thialfi laughed at that.  “Very well.”  He leaned forward, pushing deeper into Theron’s willing softness.  Theron gasped, arched again, but this time Thialfi’s hands were on his hips, controlling him and keeping Theron from moving as his body wanted to.  “Wanton, indeed.”  He held Theron still until the first series of spasms had passed, then started moving back and forth, moving the head of his cock in search of that spot that his fingers had caressed earlier.

Theron’s gasps became loud cries of passionate need, then a long, drawn-out moan as he came again, his entire body shaking with pleasure.  He could feel his insides, stretched out to accommodate the girth of Thialfi’s cock, clutching at the penetration, trying to draw the incredible cock in deeper, to hold Thialfi closer.  In response, Thialfi pounded him harder, stroking that spot with every powerful thrust.  In shock, Theron realized he was coming yet again, and Thialfi slammed Theron down on his cock.  He could feel Thialfi’s balls pulsing against him, the cock throbbing inside him, then some hot liquid flooding his insides.  Theron had no idea what noises he was making, only that they stopped when Thialfi began kissing him again and whispering to him in the Sith language.  He could still feel Thialfi’s cock twitching inside him.  The heated stream continued to flow, filling him to a point that was slightly uncomfortable.  Theron tried to explain but all he could get out was a soft noise of protest.  He felt completely drained, and he could barely keep his eyes open.  Thialfi kissed him on the neck, and carefully lifted Theron in his arms.  Theron rested his head against Thialfi, and closed his eyes as he heard the door to the refresher open.  The next thing he knew, the door was chiming.

The room was barely lit.  Theron sat up slightly, then decided to lie down again before he passed out.  He could hear Thialfi walk over to the door.  There was the soft whisper of silk on skin, and he guessed Thialfi was wearing clothes again.

“My Lord.”  The medical officer was there, bowing low to Thialfi.  “How may I serve you?”

Theron blinked as his brain suddenly started working again.  “Crap.”

“You’re awake.”  Thialfi looked at him, but Theron couldn’t see his expression.  “Talos, he requires your attention.  I will be in the galley.”

“Ah, yes,” said Talos brightly as Thialfi started walking.  “I never did get to finish tending to your wounds,” he said to Theron.  “I do hope you’re not in too terrible shape.  Still, I suppose it was worth it?”

“Yes.”

Thialfi stepped outside without looking at Theron, and locked the room into privacy mode again.

 

_Concubine_

Theron rested against the cool walls outside the galley and listened.  Thialfi was talking to Revel.  Theron still felt like a novice idiot when he realized how well Thialfi’s team had been keeping track of him.  And then he wished that he had access to the vast network that Imperial Intelligence did, and felt jealous.  And then he realized that Thialfi had used that vast network for the purpose of keeping him safe, and wondered if there was a word in the Sith language to describe how treasured and protected that made him feel.  He knew there wasn’t a way to say it in Basic.

“Boss.  Stop looking so glum.  It makes me want to kill someone.”

“Sorry,” laughed Thialfi.  “I’m fine, really.  Don’t kill anyone, Revel.”

“You look sated, at least.  Does that mean you managed to get past the crazy Republic hangups and actually get somewhere with the pretty spyboy?”  Revel laughed.  “Oh, come on.  You’ve seen those Jedi sex ed books, right?  They’re really short.  First page just says ‘NO.’  Second page is about hooking up with same sex.  ‘NO UNLESS YOU PROMISE NEVER TO DO IT.’”

Thialfi laughed somewhat wearily at Revel’s joke.

“The last page is about having sex to have babies.  It just says, ‘MAYBE.’”

“It’s not really that bad, is it?  It probably is.  Yet another reason to be glad I was raised a Sith,” mused Thialfi.

“Speaking of being a Sith, the wife called.  Nothing important, she’s fine,” said Revel quickly.  “Still busy being preggers.  She saw Lana walk by though, and was super suspicious.  No worries,” Revel said, trying to be as serious as he could.  “I told her you were in bed, and totally not interested in Lana.”

“I don’t know whether to thank you,” murmured Thialfi, “or punch you.”

Theron realized that Revel knew he was listening, and wasn’t sure what to do or where to go.

“Not in the face, boss!”  Revel laughed.  “Oh, come on, you had fun, didn’t you?”

“He was hurt,” said Thialfi quietly.  “I didn’t know.”

“What, with that thing?   I would think you’d be used to it by now.”

There was the solid sound of a blow, and Revel made a pained noise.

“Revel.”

“Ow.  Sorry, boss.  It was a joke.  I know you wouldn’t do anything like that.  But wasn’t he hurt already?  I know he grabbed some painkillers and washed the blood off before he ran to hide in your room.  It couldn’t have been that serious.”  There was silence, so Revel went on.  “What?”

“I didn’t want him to be hurt, and all I’ve done is fail him over and over.  Don’t roll your eyes at me, Revel.”

“Oh, come on, boss.  He’s not made of glass.  He made a choice because he wanted something from you.  Give him a little credit.  Patch him up and cuddle him again.  He’ll be fine.  For real, you’re a Sith and you kill people for a living.  Where does all this touchy-feely romantic crap come from?”  Revel grumbled.  “I’m out, boss.  There’s plenty more of that wasaka berry stuff in the cooler,” he added as he walked back upstairs.

Thialfi frowned as he watched his pilot walk away.  “I don’t drink wasaka - ”

Theron gave up and walked into the galley, to lean against the counter next to Thialfi.  The Sith was standing by the sink, holding a can of some Imperial drink that Theron didn’t recognize.  He wasn’t wearing much, only a full, ankle-length, plain black lower robe.  Theron privately wished Thialfi had a shirt on, because the slender, muscular, bare chest before him was insanely distracting.

“Thirsty?”  Thialfi handed the can of wasaka berry drink to Theron.

“Revel does this to me on purpose, doesn’t he?”  Theron blushed slightly, but opened the can and took a sip, grateful to have something to do with his hands, and for the gesture, regardless of Revel’s true reasons.

“Do you like them?”

Theron nodded.  “Love ‘em.  They’re really sweet.”  He could tell Thialfi had no idea how to respond to that.

“Are you all right?” Thialfi asked after a few heartbeats of perfect silence.

Theron nodded again.  “Your medic got to finish this time.  I didn’t run off in the middle.”  Impulsively, he leaned closer and kissed Thialfi on the lips.  “Sorry for scaring you.”

Surprised but pleased, Thialfi pulled him closer, wrapping his arms around Theron almost protectively.  “I thought I had hurt you.”

Theron sank into the embrace.  He put an arm around Thialfi’s waist and rested his head on the Sith’s shoulder, and played nervously with the can of wasaka berry drink.  “I realized that, just a little late.  Wasn't you.  I’m sorry,” Theron repeated, “so sorry.”

“What were you thinking?”

Theron sighed impatiently.  He didn’t really have time to explain everything.  “You didn’t fail me,” he said calmly.  “Yeah, I listened.  Sorry.  But you didn’t.  You were - everything I wanted.”  Theron kissed him again, and hoped he was making sense.  He wanted Thialfi to understand, even if he he never approved.  “I wanted you, I didn't want to wait, I didn’t want -”  He stopped before he got too pathetic.

“You are such a fool....”  It wasn’t the words, but the way he said them, that let Theron know he was forgiven.  At least partially.  It was enough.  Thialfi kissed him, holding Theron tightly to him, pressing their bodies together.

“Yeah.”  The kiss went on for longer than Theron expected, and he didn’t want to be the one to break it, but he had to pull away.  “Wow.”

“Did you forget to breathe again?” smiled Thialfi.  He looked at Theron, and his smile faded, still loving but suddenly serious.  “You’re so beautiful, Theron.  Having you in my arms is something I didn’t dare to dream of.”

Theron smiled.  “Really?  I couldn’t stop dreaming about it once I got the idea in my head.”  He leaned forward and kissed Thialfi on the cheek.  “So I guess this means you’re willing to do it again?”

“Please.”  The word was restrained passion, and the sound of Thialfi’s desire made Theron shiver.

Theron looked away quickly, trying to keep some sort of self-control intact.

“You surprise me,” said Thialfi slowly.  “You’re so self-confident and assured, but then, there are some things you do that make me feel I don’t know very well you at all.”

Theron grinned ruefully.  “When it comes to sex, I’m pretty much hopeless.”  He shrugged.  “You get all the benefits, though.  Don’t knock it.”

“There’s more to it than that.  Don’t mock yourself, Theron, not for me.”  Thialfi kissed him again, fiercely at first, then gentle and loving.  The kiss left Theron shaking.  “Sit down with me, have breakfast.  Tell me about the real you.  The one who favors sweet childish drinks.  The one who has decided my shoulders are his pillows of choice.  The one who was willing to risk death for my kisses.”

“It wasn’t that bad,” Theron protested weakly, but let Thialfi lead him to the small table in the corner.  He sat down on the chair closest to Thialfi, and tried not to smile ridiculously when Thialfi took his hand.  “I can’t believe no one has come down to use the galley.  You’d think someone else would be hungry,” Theron laughed.

Thialfi raised an eyebrow.  “My household knows better than to interrupt me when I want to be alone,” he pointed out.  “Either Xalek or Revel is standing guard on the stairs.  Possibly both.”

“Oh.”  Theron laughed, half-nervous and half-awed.  “Didn’t think of that.”  Thialfi was still a Sith, after all.

“I never thought about -” Thialfi paused, trying to find the right way to phrase his thoughts.  “What we’re doing - it really isn’t allowed in the Republic, is it?”

Theron took a sip from his drink before answering.  “It’s heavily discouraged,” he said finally.  “There’s no law against being gay - being attracted to other men -” he clarified quickly, seeing that Thialfi wasn’t familiar with Republic slang.  “It’s just that, there’s no support for it.  It’s just as invisible as they can make it.  Like, if you were my partner and we lived together, we wouldn’t be considered a couple, just roommates.  They’d deploy us together, because to the system, we’d be just friends.  But if you were wounded in battle, I wouldn’t be allowed to visit you in the hospital for comfort or anything.  If you had kids, I wouldn’t be allowed to live with you or take care of them if anything happened to you.  You wouldn’t be able to pay my bills for me.  People like me - we don’t really exist.  We’re just minor aberrations, and eventually you break down and get married to someone so that you can get shit done, you know?  The path of least resistance is paved with intentions that are good for society.”

Thialfi just frowned.

“It’s better in the Empire, isn’t it?  We’re not doing anything special here.  You’re just - taking what you want.”

“Peace is a lie,” said Thialfi softly, “there is only passion.  We follow our desires with all the strength we possess.  The idea of legislating passion out of existence is so repulsive to me, I am having trouble formulating words to express myself.”  Thialfi bent his head down and kissed Theron’s hand.  “If you were part of the Empire, you would have a place of honor in my household.  Other Sith would desire you simply because you are mine, if they did not desire you for your personal beauty.”

Theron blushed.  “Hey.  Don’t talk like that!  Guys aren’t beautiful.”

Thialfi laughed at him.  “You are.  You would make an excellent concubine.”

“Concubine?” Theron repeated, still blushing and trying to pretend that his heart hadn’t just skipped a beat.  “Okay, I like that better than what the Kaleesh calls me.”

“What?”

Theron smiled wryly, trying to decide if Thialfi was angry with his apprentice and why.  He sounded angry.  Theron took a quick sip from his drink instead.  “Not to my face.  Which is good, I really hate that word,” he said casually.  He glanced quickly at Thialfi, trying to decide if he should go on.  There was something cold and implacable in Thialfi’s eyes.  Theron shrugged.  “He calls me your ‘republic whore.’  Which wasn’t even true!  Might be now,”  Theron grinned, trying to convince Thialfi that he wasn’t really annoyed.  “If you can get him to give me a new title, though, that would be cool.  Although I bet ‘concubine’ is a lot harder to work into normal conversation.”

“Xalek will not call you that again.”

“You’re mad.  Don’t be mad,” said Theron quickly.  “I’m not trying to cause trouble!  I - just - can you get him to call me something else?  That’s all.  Don’t be mad.”

Thialfi smiled slowly, and leaned over to kiss Theron on the lips.  “I will not be mad, because you wish it.”

“Thanks.”

“You are - different,” said Thialfi quietly.  “You could abuse your position, but you do not.”

“What?  Of course not - that’s not - it’s not something I would do.  Would anyone?  Really?  Who does that?”

“Many people,” said Thialfi dryly.  “But - not you.”  He kissed Theron’s hand again.  “You fascinate me.  You are kind, not out of weakness, but from some strength I cannot see.  You would rather suffer the insults than cause discord, wouldn’t you?  Don’t do that,” Thialfi urged.  “Don’t suffer.  Tell me, and I will make it right.  And I will not be angry - not the way a Sith would be angry.  I promise you.”

“Yeah, that’s - I think I’m falling in love with you, Thialfi.  I hope that’s okay.”

“I think that is wonderful.”  He kissed Theron again, pulling him closer.  “I believe I am falling in love with you, as well.”

“Do they outlaw contractions in the Empire, or something?”  Theron fought back the urge to giggle like a schoolgirl.  “Or is it just because the slow, careful accent makes everything 130% sexier?”

Thialfi smiled, and whispered something in the sibilant language of the Sith.  “How does that measure on your scale, Theron?”

“Sexy as fuck.  What did you say this time?  I feel like I should recognize some of those phrases by now.”

Thialfi kissed him again instead of answering.  “Let’s go upstairs.”

“That - that sounds great,” said Theron, and kissed Thialfi hungrily.  “Will you tell me what you said when we get there?”

“Yes.  And afterwards,” murmured Thialfi as he led him back to the bedroom, “nothing will be suppressed, especially not your wonderful noises.”

Theron laughed and eagerly followed him.  The ship looked completely empty when they passed through.  He thought he saw a flash of golden curls near the cargo hold, but Lana didn’t make a noise or come out to greet him.  Theron walked quickly into the room before she could make an appearance.

“You’re doing it again,” said Thialfi as he put the room into privacy mode.

Theron looked around. Someone had already cleaned the room and replaced the sheets.  They were silver today, with black pillows. "What?"

“Doing things I barely understand.”

“What's to understand? Ah, that's not fair, is it?” grinned Theron, and sat down on the bed.  “Sorry. I'm nervous. I'm intimidated. I'm terrified that something will happen that means no more sex with the hot Sith.”

Thialfi answered by leaning down to kiss Theron, gently pushing him down to the bed without ever breaking the kiss.  Theron wrapped his arms around Thialfi, holding him as tightly as he could.

“You taste like sugar.”  Thialfi moved his kisses down to Theron’s neck, making Theron moan softly.  He whispered in Sith again, murmuring the words into Theron’s skin.  “A Sith survives on desire, and I desire you.”  He repeated it again, the Sith words burning themselves into Theron’s brain.  “Theron….”

Theron was almost beyond words.  He closed his eyes, arched into Thialfi’s kisses, letting Thialfi tear his clothes away.  He could feel Thialfi’s hardness pressing against his own.  Theron ran his hands through Thialfi’s hair, down Thialfi’s back, touching every part of Thialfi’s body that he could reach.  He slid his hand between Thialfi’s legs, to stroke and touch, to feel Thialfi’s cock swell under his touch.  He ran his hand up and down the shaft, tracing the path of the thick ridges on the underside and the one just under the head of Thialfi’s cock, the one that was placed to rub right against that spot inside a man.  He heard Thialfi breathe out slowly in an effort to remain in control, a noise of pleasure, almost a hiss.  Then Thialfi’s lips were on his again, dominating and greedy.  Theron loved it.  He moved his legs up, spreading them wider for his lover to claim him.  On an impulse, he guided Thialfi’s cock closer, rubbing the tip against his body.  There was no lubrication there except sweat and the slight dew oozing from Thialfi.  It wasn’t enough to do more than tease.  Theron shuddered with pleasure at the the touch, and it was maddening enough that Thialfi broke the kiss long enough to grab the bottle of lubricant.

Thialfi kissed him again, over and over, while he poured the slick oil on his fingers and worked them into Theron’s body.

Theron continued stroking Thialfi, savoring the feel.  He could hear Thialfi breathing faster as they played with each other, his hand on Thialfi and Thialfi’s fingers inside him.  Theron gasped as Thialfi’s fingers brushed over that spot.  Thialfi pulled away quickly, drew his fingers out.  He moved his body higher and closer, still kissing Theron, leaving it for Theron to guide him.  Theron smiled with pleasure at the license he had been given.  He stroked it again, then gently moved Thialfi closer to him, rubbed the head against his body again.  This time was easier.  He could feel the lubricant sliding out as he slowly worked Thialfi’s cock into his body.  Every inch was another shock of ecstasy.  He couldn’t believe Thialfi was going along with this, letting him take what felt like hours.  Theron still had his eyes closed.  He could hear Thialfi breathing heavily, almost panting when he wasn’t kissing Theron with fiery passion.  But Thialfi waited, and left Theron in control.

Finally it was all the way in.  Theron hooked a leg around Thialfi.  “Holy...fuck, that’s amazing.  You’re amazing,” he breathed.  “So good.  Gods.”

“You’re beautiful.”

Theron blushed.  “Did you watch me the whole time?”

“So beautiful….”

He shifted his hips, making Thialfi gasp.  “Fuck me, please.  Take me.  Do it.”

Thialfi didn’t need a second invitation.  They began moving together, long slow strokes of controlled desire that got faster and faster, drawing gasps and moans of pleasure from Theron that got louder and louder, until Thialfi slammed his full length into Theron, making him scream in ecstasy and fall to the bed.  Theron’s eyes opened for a moment, to see Thialfi’s pleased smile, then he closed them again, this time to pass out.

 

“You seem to have better control with your eyes closed,” Thialfi observed.  “Is that why you do it?”

“I was listening,” smiled Theron.  “And yeah, it makes it easier to focus.”

“Interesting.  I’ll have to try that sometime.”  Thialfi leaned over to give Theron a kiss, then slid off the bed and stretched.  Theron watched the movements with a smile, but didn’t move.  He was still too tired.  “Would you like me to clean you off?”

“Oh, sure.”  Theron shifted slightly, moving his legs so that Thialfi could reach.  But instead of touching him with a towel, Thialfi pulled Theron closer to the edge of the bed.  “Wait,” asked Theron drowsily, “what are you doing?”  He opened his eyes, just in time to see Thialfi kneeling down as he spread Theron’s legs apart even further.  “What?”  Thialfi’s dark hair was all Theron could see, and then he could feel Thialfi’s tongue swirling around his limp cock.  “Maker!” he gasped and closed his eyes again, dug his hands into the sheets.  Thialfi’s tongue swiped across his sore and swollen hole, soothing Theron with soft strokes as he lapped away the fluids he had so recently deposited there.  Theron moaned, thrashing his head from side to side as Thialfi’s tongue worked in and out of his body.  He thought he was too exhausted to come again, but his body still shuddered under the influence of Thialfi’s skillful attentions.

“Theron?”

Theron made a soft noise, and opened one eye.  He was lying on the bed, with his head resting in Thialfi’s lap, separated from Thialfi’s cock by a single bedsheet.  “That was amazing.  Sith really do have weird sex lives, don’t they?  I thought all that stuff was made up.”  He stretched, reaching up so that he could run his hands over Thialfi’s naked chest.

Thialfi blushed slightly.  “Well, what do you do for post-coital cleansing in the Republic?” he asked curiously.

“Shower,” grinned Theron.  “And pay the hotel bill before anyone notices you.  Unless you’re having sex with a Jedi, then you just quickly wipe away all evidence that you did anything and run to the Jedi Temple to talk about how to suppress all emotions and physical desires.”

“That sounds awful.”  Thialfi looked down at Theron.  “Have you ever had sex with a Jedi?”

“Mmmm… a few times.  The same one.  It was fun, but nerve-wracking.”

“What happened to him?”

“Nothing.  He’s still a Jedi.  There wasn’t anything behind it, just sex.  He only did it to please me.”

“Odd.”

“Very,” Theron grinned.  “Like I said, Jedi.”

Thiafli smiled wryly at him.  “May I ask another question?”

“Sure!”  Theron tried to keep his smile natural.  He knew what the question was going to be.

“Have you ever… never mind.”

“You can ask,” Theron laughed.  “I’m fine.  Go ahead!”

Thialfi leaned down to kiss him.  “I’m not.”

Theron closed his eyes for the kiss, and kept them closed even after Thialfi pulled away.  “No, really, you should ask.  Get it out of the way.  Have I ever had sex with a Sith, besides you?”  Theron laughed softly and bitterly.  “It depends!  Does rape count as sex?”

“I was afraid it was something like that,” sighed Thialfi.  He twined his fingers into Theron’s.  “Which says something about the Sith, doesn’t it?  I was fairly certain that I already knew the answer before I asked.”  He stroked Theron’s face.  “I suppose I was hoping the answer would be different.”  He lifted Theron’s hand to his lips and kissed it.

“Thanks.”  Theron’s eyes were still closed.  “Hey, what about you?  I mean, you were a slave… did you you ever….  Wow, that sounds so childish.”

“Not at all,” smiled Thialfi gently.  “I suffered much as a slave, but not that.  I was beaten frequently for being willful, but that same spirit meant I wasn’t chosen to be anyone’s favorite.”

“You’re my favorite,” smiled Theron, and pulled Thialfi closer for another kiss.

“Then I am content.”

 

_Never even considered it._

Theron sat down on Thialfi's lap, and took a sip of his drink. It was a bubbly pink drink, the dizzyingly sweet kind that Theron loved.

Thialfi could smell the sugar in it, and looked up in surprise. "I thought you were dancing." He wrapped one arm around Theron's waist. "What brings you here?"

Theron smiled, and hooked one leg around Thialfi's leg. "Oh, nothing," he said innocently. From across the crowded barroom, he could hear Revel choking on his drink, and had to hold back his laughter.

"All right," said Thialfi with mock weariness. "What are you two up to?"

“Number six on the list.”  Theron snuggled closer and gave Thialfi a quick kiss on the cheek, laughing lightly before answering. "It's nothing, really," he insisted. "Just a little in-joke.  Revel suggested reading something once, and I’m actually following his advice."

"Revel giving advice?  I’m doomed.  But,” Thialfi smiled, “it benefits me, doesn’t it?”  He stole another kiss.

Someone walked near the table where they were sitting, a man with the aggressive swagger of intoxication.  "You filth.  You're disgusting." Theron and Thialfi both looked up at the interruption.  The man was drunk, and clearly a Republic soldier, even out of the uniform.  Nar Shadaa attracted all types.  “I shouldn’t have to see you scum parading your dirty ways in public.  Do you know what you look like?”

Theron shrugged.  “I hope I look like a guy having a drink with his boyfriend.”  He took another sip from his glass and looked at Thialfi, who tried to hold back his laughter.  Theron settled himself back into Thialfi’s lap and looked up innocently at the angry soldier.

“Boyfriend?  He’s a Sith, you filthy fag.  You look like a fucking whore,” growled the soldier.  “You should be ashamed of yourself.”

“But we’re not fucking,” grinned Theron.  Only Thialfi noticed the sudden tightening of his shoulders.  “And I believe my current job title is ‘concubine.’”

The drunk man moved his glass, as if to throw his drink, but Xalek was there as always, and he was faster.  There was a loud crash as the drunk was thrown to the floor, and the Kaleesh pounced on him to deliver punishment.  Theron glanced at Thialfi, who made no move to stop his apprentice.  “Hey, hey, easy,” laughed Theron before Xalek could do any real damage.  “No manslaughter!  Don’t get me barred from another cantina, okay?”

“I don’t need your help, whore,” snarled the soldier as he struggled back to his feet, ready for a fight.

Theron couldn’t keep his shoulders from tightening every time he heard the word, despite his attempts to brush off the sting.  He looked away from the confrontation for a second, trying to find his center again, but all he could see was the angry crowd, the same ones that had been pointedly ignoring him all evening, scornfully glaring at him but too afraid of the Sith and his apprentice to get involved.  “Oh, fuck it,” whispered Theron.  He could feel Thialfi’s hands on his hips, but he pulled away and stood up, facing the man who had started the whole incident.  “Fuck it.  Fuck you.  Fuck your judging, fuck you for spitting on me because I won’t accept starving to death and dying alone for being different.  Fuck.  You.”

The soldier, and most of the crowd as well, stood still, frozen by the sudden change in Theron’s attitude.  Xalek moved away, silent but still ready to intervene before any threat came near his any of his Master’s possessions.

Theron took a deep breath, trying to keep his rage in check and his words coherent.  “You think I chose this?  You think I wanted to be a pariah, have every judgement in every job double-checked because I don’t have a wife and kids?  You don’t think I would have spared myself all those years of bullshit and misery if I could have chosen to be like everybody else?  Fuck!  You!”  Theron forced himself to take another breath, and stopped himself from screaming his anger.  “You fucking hypocrite,” he said bitterly.  There was a sharp pain in his head, and he wanted to run off and hide his head in a bucket of ice water.  Or burst out crying, but the ice water seemed more realistic.  “What the hell is the Republic really for, anyway?  Diversity, so long as everyone’s the same.  Unity, so long as no one is too different.  Equality, but only for the people who fit the bill.  I did my part, I fought for the Republic, I gave everything I had, I watched my friends die fighting, just like everybody else,” Theron realized he was shaking now, but he didn’t stop.  “Just like everybody else,” he repeated.  “But now that all the fighting is done, I don’t get the right to go home to someone I love.  Because I’m different.  So fuck you, and fuck the Republic that doesn’t give a fuck about me.”  At this point, Theron wasn’t even sure if he was crying or not.  “Fuck you for blaming me because I wanted something better.”  He turned away and walked out of the cantina through the back door, without waiting to see if any of his words had made it through the man’s skull or if they had bounced off the uniform like they usually did.  He had time to take one shuddering breath before Thialfi was there, before Thialfi pulled him into his arms, before Thialfi was holding him tightly.  Theron buried his face in his lover’s chest and clutched desperately at him, let himself be supported by his lover's strength.

There was a noise behind them, the door closing.  Theron turned, since Thialfi didn’t move to attack.  It was the Kaleesh.  His robes were slightly torn, but he didn’t look very damaged.  Xalek knelt down, bowing his head all the way to the ground.  “I humbly beg your forgiveness.”

It took Theron a second to realize that the apology was directed to him.  “What?  What - what are you apologizing for?”

“I used words to mock you, in a way that was unworthy.  I thought you were weak, and considered your sacrifices to be meaningless.  I was wrong.  You are, indeed, worthy of my Master.”

“Thanks,” said Theron quietly.  “Thanks.”

“Go,” Thialfi commanded.

There was a glance between Master and apprentice that Theron really didn’t understand.  It was partially approval, that much even he could see.  Xalek rose, with that eerie swift silence common to all trained as he was, and opened the door again.  Theron could hear the sounds of a lively bar fight going on.  He considered.  Xalek had walked out in the middle of a fight to apologize to him.  He wondered if Thialfi’s crew was beginning to think he really had a place at Thialfi’s side.

“That was all very real,” said Thialfi finally.  “I don’t think you were acting in there.”

Theron wanted to look up and calmly explain, but what came out was an ugly sob, then another.  He couldn’t explain.  It would take too long to untangle the real hurts from the ones he didn’t consider worth remembering.  And time was a luxury that Theron couldn't afford.

 

_You should see the way Theron is glaring at me._

“The Massassi must be furious,” mused Lana.  “Their best warriors are falling before him like so much chaff.”  There was silence from the man next to her, and she turned to look at him.  “You’re not enjoying this.”

“Of course not,” snapped Theron.  “I’m worried.  I know he can do it, but - I wish I didn’t have to just sit here and wait.”

Lana smiled.  “How ridiculous.  Really, I expected better from you.  This isn’t work for spies, Theron.  It’s work for soldiers, and Jedi - and Sith.  But then,” she glanced back at the screen again, as the last perimeter sensor came online, “he isn’t leaving much work for anyone else at all.”

Theron went back to looking at the computer screen in front of him.

“So there isn’t much you could offer to help,” said Lana quietly.  “Besides, that’s not what he wants you for.”

“Can we not?” snarled Theron.  “Can we leave this for later?  Or maybe never?”

“Fine.”

“Or if you’re going to do the angry kitten act, can you at least do it when he’s here to hear you, so he knows what he’s missing?”

Jakarro made a noise that might have been a laugh, but he got up and walked farther away from the angry pair before they could turn on him.

“You dare - ”  Lana was so angry she couldn’t finish her sentence, and the fact that Theron was waiting patiently only served to make her more angry.  In the end, she turned back to the computer screen as well.

“Look, I didn’t do anything.  I don’t deserve this, not from you.  Why can’t you just - I don’t know, let me be happy?”  Theron’s voice was strained and angry, but he was still trying to keep his voice low.  Clearly this wasn’t the first time he had crossed swords with Lana on this topic.

“For the time being, fine,” she said tightly.  “We both know it won’t last.  There isn’t anything worth keeping.”

“You just had to go there,” said Theron wearily.  “You can’t just let it go.  It just really burns you, doesn’t it?  You have everything he ought to want, and he doesn’t.  But you can’t bring yourself to hate him, so you have to dig your little kitten claws into me.”

The comparison to a cute, harmless animal did nothing to make Lana calm down.  “It doesn’t matter what he does now,” she said quietly.  “Or with you.  We’ll be done here soon enough, and you can go back to your glittering Coruscanti towers, and leave us Sith to pick up where you left off.  You’re of no real importance, or permanence, Theron.  Yes, you irritate me, but I am not jealous.  Why would I be?  I can just sit here and wait.”

Theron stood up, almost knocking over the plain Republic computer chair.  “Sorry.  I’ll be right back.  I need some air.”  He had turned so his face was hidden from her, and Jakarro was already gone.  Theron left the room quickly, almost running, without acknowledging the slight smile of triumph on Lana’s face.

Darth Marr looked up from his seat.  He had been meditating, all the way across the room. Unable to hear Lana’s low argument with Theron, he could only see the effects.  “Was that wise?”  asked Marr.

“He will forgive me,” said Lana quietly.  “No, my Lord.  It was not wise.  But - ”  She lowered her head, and took a deep breath.  “It felt good.  I will not do it again.”

Theron walked over to the Republic encampment, and sat down on the stairs, mentally making sure he was as far away from Lana as he could get, and hid his head in his arms.  He heard someone walk over.

“You’re distressed.  Is there anything I can do to help?” asked Satele Shan.  She spoke like the Grandmaster of the Order, she always did.  Never as a mother.

Theron shook his head without answering, then realized he was being childish.  “I just… needed some space.  To get away from -”  He stopped himself before he could be childish again.  “I’m just having a moment.  I’ll be fine.”

“If you let yourself be controlled by your emotions,” she said gently, “you won’t be able to focus for what needs to be done.”

“Yeah, that’s what happens when you have emotions,” he snapped.  “They affect you.”  Theron forced himself to sit up and looked at his erstwhile mother.  “Sorry.  This is harder than I want it to be.  We’re friends, real friends, not just ‘as friendly as you can expect a Sith to be.’  And I know why she’s upset, and she’s taking it out on me because that’s all she can do.  I get that.  It doesn’t make it hurt any less.”  Theron looked away, then stretched out his arms, trying to fight back the tension and turmoil in his heart.

“Friends?”  Satele blinked at him.  “With a Sith.”

Theron grinned.  “Two Sith, if  you’re counting.  Not counting Marr, we haven’t had him over for sabaac yet.  Jakarro says you can’t trust anyone until you’ve beaten them at sabaac.”

Satele smiled gently.  “You shift so quickly,” she said, almost to herself.  “So, is that what all the noise was from your rooms last night?”

Theron blushed slightly, then shrugged.  “Yeah, our nights in tend to get out of hand.  I was going to invite you over,” he grinned, “but I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t enjoy it.  You’d spend three-quarters of the time just being scandalized.”

“Oh?” said Satele calmly.  “And the rest of the time?”

“Depends on your tolerance for cheating,” he smiled, but she didn’t join him in the humor.  “You’re not impressed,” he observed.

“No,” she said slowly.  “I understand the need to work with them, but I cannot understand calling a Sith a ‘friend’ under any circumstances.  I am suspicious, and not just because of my position.  I can see that they understand the necessity, but I cannot see why any of the Sith here would call you - or indeed, any of us - a friend."

Theron shrugged.  “Well, it’s easier to work with people when you don’t spend every second suspecting them of inherent treachery.”

“And yet, here you are, distraught.”

Theron’s smile twisted slightly.  “This is different.  It’s pretty much the same reaction every woman in the galaxy has when a guy picks another guy over her.”

“So it is true,” said Satele quietly.  “I try not to listen to rumors, but that one has been remarkably persistent.”

Theron shrugged.  “Yeah.  I’m pretty sure everything in a uniform has been trying to get you to do something about my ‘moral shortcomings,’” he said, laughing mockingly at himself.  “Lecture incoming?”

Satele shook her head.  “You aren’t going to betray the Republic, and he isn’t going to leave the Empire.  I’ll trust that you know what you are doing.”

Theron’s shoulders slumped, and he stared at his hands.  “Gee, thanks.”

“What else should I say?” smiled Satele wryly.  “You know as well as I do that it will never last.”

Theron winced, and hid his face in his hands again.  "Yeah.  That's the part that is making me miserable."  He knew she understood.  He could never leave the Republic, and he didn't want to.  He would never join the Empire, it wasn't in his nature.  He knew that.  She knew that.

"Does this - man - really deserve so much from you?" she asked wonderingly.

Theron idly wondered how hard it had been for her to say 'man' instead of 'Sith.'  "I have no idea how to answer that," he said finally.  "But I think he does.  I didn’t decide to trust him in a day.  I didn’t just see him and let myself be swayed.  It took a long time, so long that I actually wasted days I could have been happy,” he said bitterly.  “I couldn’t let myself believe.  But then I got up enough courage and took a leap of faith," he said with a smile.  "I learned to believe my heart and his, and he earned my trust.”

"Then he must be a wonderful person," she said quietly.  "I'm sorry."

Theron dropped his head to his knees.  "Thanks."  It was the most maternal thing he had ever heard her say.

 

_We were dead, and you - thank you._

Theron looked up as the first scout stumbled into the camp.  Medics ran up to help, then another one stumbled in, dragging a broken leg.  Both Imperial and Republic medics were at the gate now, helping wounded soldiers who could barely stand, even as more came limping in.  Whispers spread like wildfire.  A Republic scouting mission gone wrong.  Captured by Massassi.  Saved by a Sith.

It wasn’t until someone pointed at him that Theron understood.

His Sith.  Saved by his Sith.

He saw Marr glance quickly at him, but he couldn’t tell what the Dark Lord was thinking under the mask.  He could see the medics pointedly not looking in his direction, forcing themselves to focus only on the wounded.  He saw young Sith apprentices grab their weapons and run out to get in on the killing before it was too late.  More sedate Jedi left just as quickly, but probably with purer motives.  As soon as she thought he wasn’t looking, he saw Lana turn away.  She quietly returned to the privacy of her quarters, leaving Theron alone.

He didn’t see any sign of Thialfi.

Theron watched the gate for a while, then forced himself to look away.  He couldn’t keep staring and waiting for Thialfi to appear.  The letters on his datapad were incomprehensible, but at least he didn’t look like an abandoned nexu waiting for his master to return.  It struck him that he had just read the same row of numbers for the fifth time.  Theron deactivated his datapad.  He wasn’t sure where he should go, but he knew he had to do something.  He heard someone unfamiliar walking up behind him, and looked around, careful not to be too obvious in his observation.

“Uh, you’re the guy right?  The one who’s dating that Sith?”

Theron rolled his eyes, and spun his chair around to face the nervous soldier.  “Yeah.  That’s me, I’m the guy.”  He cocked his head.  The soldier was a Republic infantry trooper, not very old, nervous but not antagonistic.  “What’s up?”

“I just - he saved us, you know.  A bunch of us, from the Massassi.  He found a datapad from our XO and came out to this nest of Massassi to keep us from being eaten alive.  He cut down all their guards and saved everyone who was left of our unit.  I just wanted to say - you’re damn lucky, to have someone like that.”  The kid held out his hand to Theron.  “So yeah, I’ve heard some people were giving you shit for whatever reason.  You ever need a hand, just call on Viridian Squad.  We got your back.”

Theron just stared at him for a moment, trying to process the words.  “Thanks.”  The words were inadequate, but it was all he had.

The kid grinned, and Theron had no way of knowing if the young soldier really understood.  “Anyway, he should be here in a little while.  He cleared the path for us, then went back to get something he said he wanted to show Grandmaster Shan and Darth Masked.  I mean Marr,” grinned the kid, with the irrepressible good humor of the Republic.  “So I won’t bug you now, but we’re going for drinks later, all right?”  He clapped Theron on the shoulder, then limped away to go back to the infirmary.


End file.
